Psychoactively Clueless

I admit it: my garden looks like hell. I've only started seeds for carrots, radishes and scallions (and I think the scallions are dead). Everything needs weeding badly. The lawn needs mowing. I cannot seem to keep up with the work with everything else I have to do, and yet I can't relinquish the dream of this garden.

One thing that seems to be growing with no problem at all is the kitchen sage. It's also known as salvia officinalis if you're interested in that kind of thing. The reason the Latin name for the plant is somewhat relevant, I discovered, is that there are about 1000 different species of sage. After watching Champ chomp down on an entire dried bundle of sage (that I use to smudge my home - more on that later), I became concerned. I seem to remember a factoid from long ago, that sage has hallucinogenic properties. Champ is pretty strange to being with, so the thought of dealing with him in the midst of a psychoactive sage trip was just a little more than I was willing to deal with. Oh, and of course I don't want it to harm him; the reason I haven't been more concerned with that is because he seems to be able to eat all manner of things without effect. This is the same dog who ate an entire straw clothes hamper, a tennis ball (ate it), a pad of post-it-notes, several books, a slurpee cup, and a wood fence, and with no ill effects. His stomach is made of iron.

Salvia plants in general have a long history as medicinal herbs. Sage itself has scientifically documented healing properties to treat everything from diarrhea to alzheimer's disease. One of the active chemicals in sage, including salvia officinalis, are a class of ketones known as thujones. Thujones are part of the psychoactive ingredients in absinthe that make it so potent, and potentially toxic. However, I have a feeling that common kitchen sage has a very low amount of thujones within, otherwise people would be lined up at my front door (or sneaking around in my garden at night) just to get a few precious leaves. On a side note, I do find it amusing that a common plant (and sage has other wild variations that are intensely potent) such as sage is totally and completely legal, unlike marijuana, which really isn't all that harmful. However, I don't want to open a political hornet's nest by examining the reasons behind the stupidity of the war on pot, so let's just leave that alone.

The interesting part of this is that it took me two years to realize that the common sage I have growing in my garden is also a psychoactive drug. Granted, it's not the most potent one out there, but I'm still somewhat amused by this. I'd love to try an experiment where I stick a marijuana plant in the ground right next to the sage and let them sort of intertwine together and see if anyone notices. My bet is no one would notice. Any takers on that bet?